Everyone has difficult times come into their lives.There must be, it's what life is, change, balanced by habit, and routine.There is joy, and there is sadness as part of the whole. There must be births, there must be deaths, as well as some kind of ups, and downs in between.The Ying, and the Yang, the black, and the white. We have problems come, and go all the time. We have to survive, and learn how to deal with them. It's complex, life is complex, so much learning to do. We come to this earth knowing little except how to suck, and cry. Everything else must be learnt, often at some cost, either to ourselves, or to those around us. Learning as best we can, all the hundred, and one other things that make up modern life. Then, there is love, the biggest learning curve of all. What is the saying, love makes the world go round. Perhaps it makes all the rest, bearable, or....... totally unbearable!
As an older woman, I am, perhaps a little removed, not from love, but from passion. Or, certainly, from that first grand passion, or the second. Removed from its searing pain as experienced by the young. It's joys, and it's sorrows. That's how I feel, when I read posts on twitter, by some of the girls experiencing their first despair. Those dealing with a broken heart, or of unrequited love. It's obvious, from what they write, that they have experienced heartbreak, it's always moving. It makes me wish I could ease the path for them. I wish I could save them the pain, and the hard decisions that come after.
I'm not saying it's only girls that feel this, but it is mostly girls, who write about it. Boys, from what I've seen, are the same as ever. As when I was young, and going through it. The outward reaction of the young male, is 'what the F...., are they on about'. They post that too. As if they have no idea what the heartbroken, or hurt girls are talking about. Some of it is as a protection, or face saving perhaps. The male must appear tough, and not susceptible to girls emotions, or perhaps they don't feel it the same. We are all human though, with the same depth of emotion. How can that be? Yet it is true that girls, and boys experience 'love', or passion, in different ways. Even different depths of feeling perhaps, or mature differently.
I can say that, as a female, who has been hurt, more than once. Yes, say with some conviction, after many years of wending my way through the idiosyncrasies of relationships, or, of keeping right away from them, that there is no simple answer. Not even true love, and happily ever after. Not like they tell you in the romance stories. The story doesn't end when you fall in love, or marry, that's when it begins. The start of learning about, trust, loyalty, and commitment to each other.
Because those are the things that get you through. Reading those tweets recently, and Christmas is the time when many problems in relationships rear their head. I wish there was something I could tell them, some way to save them the heartache of being hurt. Of having to try recover, or maybe never recovering. Becoming brave enough, to try again, with the same person, or a new one. To give your heart again, to offer it up, and risk another hurt. I wish I had some secret I could pass on. Then, I realised that I do have that. Not a solution that will stop love hurting when it goes wrong, or disasters happening. I do have the secret of helping yourself through every situation.
It's love...LOVE. Simply love!
Some people call it positive programing, or positive thought. But that's not strictly true. Its just love...whatever is happening, whatever you feel is out if control in your life...think love...send love, FEEL LOVE. In other words, do not let anger, despair, or confusion take over. When under extreme duress, of any kind, calm your mind, as in the meditative way I spoke of in my earlier blog. 'Still' that busy little voice that fools you into thinking its trying the best way, to sove your problems. Because it's not, it's stirring up 'worry,' the 'what will I do,?' The 'it's all so dreadful' scenarios, and not helping at all.
Instead whenever your mind begins to worry, and fret, with indecision, or hate, or despair, change it! Change the thought, change the emotion. Send love...send it to the person you think is going to give you a bad decision. Send it to the person you hate. Sent it to everyone involved in your problem, send it to yourself, wrap yourself in it. Even if it's hard, even if you don't want to. Even if it's the hardest thing you have ever done, and you do not want to do it. Because, often, it's easier to hate.
I promise you, if you send love, love, love. Every time the problem hits your thoughts, your confidence, or your emotions, think love, feel love, and see it reaching the person, or the situation that's on your mind. Do not allow it to do anything else. I tell you now, it will help that situation come out well for you. It will help you cope, and come through. Resolved much better, than it would otherwise have done. Don't worry about how, or when, or why, just keep on sending that love.
Whether you believe it, or not, LOVE is stronger than anything else, just as light is stronger than dark. Please, through your times of trouble, just surround yourself with love. It will give you strength, it will give you hope, it will calm your soul, and if will help supply you with the best possibly outcome. Hardly anything is set in concrete, everything can be moved by love. Love can move mountains...
It does not matter whether you call that love, god, the gods, psychic ability, or magic. Love is within us all, and there is an infinite supply surrounding us. You will never call on love, from the Universe, and is is missing. Never, it is yours...never ending.
Just say you believe......
In the meantime, send love to everyone who is in need. Those who are hurting, who are lost, who are starving, who are dying, and particularly to those who are living as well as they possibly can. Which is all any of us can do.
Live well, love others, and most importantly, love yourself.
For that is where all love begins. It is not selfish, it is empowering!
HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL
Love, do no harm...
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