Monday, 2 June 2014

A little bit here, a little bit there

        Further to the delays and frustrations around me lately...I vowed to keep positive, to keep creating my own reality. I am doing that every chance I get. Of course you have to to invest some mental and physical energy into the mix too. After all, the more you stir up the energy around you, the more energy you create. Energy you can then direct, where you wish it to go. To that end, I keep aiming to do the little jobs, sort out cupboards, throw away stuff, we all have too much stuff anyway. Make phone calls, I hate to make, where did my hate of the phone come about? I must organise my dairy....most importantly have a bit of fun in the midst of all the mundane slog!
        Speaking of my dairy..... that's gone crazy too, I have such a busy week. A busy fortnight really, everything seems to be cramming together into my, already  'too short' days, it's easy to become muddled. Finances are tight, a euphemism for non existent. I don't have one credit, or debit card working at present, which, in today's world means you are out of the loop. All affected by the banks, deciding  to send me the latest smart card, ordering me one, cancelling the old one. All without telling me anything about it. I had a couple of highly embarrassing supermarket visits, where I stood with a cart of food, only to be refused. The cashier, shook her head at me sadly, 'it's usually overdrawings the problem' she said wisely.  Ignoring my protestations. Thank god for my habit of throwing change into my bag....it took some time to locate enough though, but I did it. These indispensable cards, we must all use now, all developed faults, out of my control, at the same time. What is the Universe trying to tell me? I know my poor car, running on empty is not a fan of whatever it is. What a bore, in a busy time, and unwell time, to keep running down to the bank, to get cash over the counter, or check if the new cards are there...I'm exhausted enough without all the stress of this.
         My energy levels are still likely to dip suddenly, my chest remains clogged, my sinuses blocked. On top of which, confusion reigns within me far too often. Of course, my Mother is still ill, up and down..mostly down, a world away, but always on my mind. While I spent most of the day rushing around trying to catch my tail, and make sense of what I was doing. Talk about senility, half the time I m sure I'm there! There is just too much in my head...I need a good defrag, like an old computer. 
         Of course, it's then I must rehash the picture, build the ideal scenario to bring me out of this. Out and smelling of roses, I hasten to add. Today it was copious phone calls, trying to track down the location for the change of storage unit, attempting to find the drop of point for unwanted furniture at the charity shop. Made difficult by a whole new crop of double lines up the pavement for as far as I could see. 'No stopping, No stopping' Meaning there was nowhere I was allowed to stop to unload. Oh joy! Perhaps once I have seen the fire alarm man in the morning, my landlord in the afternoon, had two doctors appointment, and a hospital visit in the following days I can slow down. Oh once I've checked my storage facilities ready for the move, and the removal transport arrangement, checked the bank again. Then finish the packing, keep the washing up to date and on, and on. As for cleaning the place once I can see the floor for boxes again, well,  I just can't imagine having the will or the energy for that, and I don't care.
        Still, one step at a time, keep on taking the pills, whatever helps. Above all keep positive and keep building utopia around me. Something's got to give soon.....after all, I'm putting in the energy!
        In the meantime, I'm climbing over and around all these boxes and piles of stuff, after bagging another couple of sacks for the charity store, gradually making my way into bed, to sleep. After I finish this of course., got to write a bit too.
         Ahhhhhh, always appreciate the blissful aspects of your life.
         Who remembers that old song?
         "You have to accentuate the positive, and eliminate the negative, latch on to the affirmative...don't mess with mr in between."
           A song for every occasision, that's me!
         
         

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